Query letters ... sigh

I have such a love/hate relationship with query letters.

I love them because writing one shows me where my story is lacking.

I hate them because writing one shows me where my story is lacking.

And that's where I am right now. I'd learn during my last ms to write out a draft query at the beginning of the writing process to ensure that my outline is on track.

The issue is that my story ended up taking some of its own twists and turns.

I think the most surprising thing for me now as I review choices and conflict and consequences is this: The character I'd assumed is my protagonist is NOT the protagonist.

Weird.

In fact, not only is she not the protagonist but she barely makes a decision for herself throughout the entire story.

And THAT is a surefire way to annoy every single reader and ensure no one gives a crap about her whatsoever.

Sigh.

The story is told in first person from two points of view. I'd figured she would be the "main" protagonist with the second person having his own decisions to make. Kind of two protagonists with their own stories that overlap, and each influencing the other's decisions.

But that's not really how it turned out. She influences him, and he definitely makes a decision. But any decisions she needed to make end up kind of being made for her. It's weird. And not what I meant to happen.

Not a deal-breaker. I can work with this. It was my first draft, after all. I didn't expect it to be perfect and submission ready right off the bat.

Writers sometimes have big buts

Well, my day job completely sidelined the initial manuscript rewrite by going totally insane with busy-ness. On the nights I didn't have to work overtime (I'm a proofreader and editor by day), I couldn't bear the thought of sitting behind a computer screen. I've continued to take notes on ideas as they've come to me, and it's been an interesting process.

I've lived out the phrase "kill your darlings" on a few different versions of this manuscript. The most extensive was when my manuscript came in at about 120,000 words. I knew I had to hack and slice, so I considered completely cutting a character out.

BIG BUT: I loved her rekindling relationship with her ex-husband.

BIG BUT: I loved her ex-husband.

BIG BUT: I loved their "snappy" dialogue.

BIG BUT: I loved her overwrought mother-in-law.

I eventually came to realize that she really didn't belong ... I loved too many things that were outside of her character and was kind of forcing her to be a part of the overall story. So, I did it. I hacked her out and saved her in her own little folder to possibly rework into a story all her own.

So now, I'm trying to integrate my characters' stories. I have the main characters - Character A, Character B and Character C - each with her own set of friends and families. They share a common experience, but their stories are separate, which is what the agents who have read it or want to read it don't like.

My initial game plan was to turn Character A's current best friend into Character B. Because of the story line I already established with Character B, she would end up working at Character A's husband's company. I then thought of a way, based on a story line already established for the husband's company, that I could incorporate the husband of Character C, thereby bringing her into the fold.

I was extremely pleased with how quickly I was able to come up with this solution and was raring to get started.

And then.

BIG BUT: Character A's current best friend as written has some significant personality differences from Character B. That means I will have to change tons of dialogue between A and her friend, as well as much of the old friend dynamic to make this new friendship work.

BIG BUT: Character B's current work situation as written will have to be tweaked to replace the current big boss with Character A's husband.

BIG BUT: I can easily find a way to get Character C's husband in the act, and I can clearly see how Character C will meet A and B ... but, then what? There has to be something more significant to the story than they all meet and chit chat. I think I have this figured out, but it will involve quite a bit of rewrite.

BIG BUT: Character B has a significant epiphany facilitated by her currently written best friend. I love this best friend. She is wicked cool. I don't want to simply replace her with Character A.

OMGsh. Can you just hear the whining I've done in my head?

Do you just want to kick me in my big buts?

After the whining and gnashing of teeth subsided, I realized that if I want to seriously resubmit this manuscript, it needs to be what it needs to be, not what I'm emotionally attached to it being. Instead of mourning the story lines and dialogue and witty scenes that I have to change, I'm looking forward to discovering how these characters will get to know each other and make a difference in each others' lives.

My goal is to have the rewrite done and ready to submit by the first day of spring - Thursday, March 20. 

Update: Back to the writing board

It's been a few weeks, but the same day I sent my query and posted my last blog entry, I heard back from the agent. She thanked me for my candor and agreed with the other agents' thoughts on the setup of my book and passed on it as it's written now. (She didn't read the full I submitted; she passed based on the info I told her in my email.) I was afraid that would happen, and I was super bummed when I got the message. At first. But then something occurred to me, and I got hopeful again.

Here's an email I sent to a coworker/friend who also dreams of publishing a novel (the subject line read IDIOT!):

 

That’s me.

SHE PASSED. Sob!

I sat here, about ready to throw up, feeling so pissed at myself for being such a complete idiot, all those HOURS AND HOURS editing when I should have been rewriting, berating myself mercilessly that I’ve had three agents interested and then reject it because of my setup.

I was all, “That’s IT! I’m done. I’m a failure. F%&* it!”

And then I recalled the part of her email that said if I wanted to rework it, to be free to come back her way.

That, my friend, is an R&R.

So, putting the quote on my wall into action – “To get what you want, you have to do what it takes” – I pulled myself up and IMMEDIATELY started drafting up notes about how I can get [my characters] to connect.

And I think I’ve got it.

Here we go again …

Yep, I'm back to the rewriting stage, but I'm excited about it. And I can't regret the path I took in submitting this project as is, because I may not have come up with the same rewrite notes six or seven months ago when I embarked on my fifth edit. Plus, if I had submitted without mentioning the feedback, chances are I would have received the same feedback again and a closed door. As it is, I have an invitation not just to re-query, but to resubmit.

I responded to the agent with the following:

Thanks for your message, ((agent name)). I was afraid that would happen, but I just couldn't, with good conscience, not mention the feedback I'd recently received.

 

I hope to query you with an updated version in the months ahead.

 

Warm regards,

 

To which she replied, "Take your time. Would love to see when done!"

 

I've been letting things simmer for a bit, jotting down notes and scenarios as they pop into my head, and I think I'm finally ready to jump in. I'm hoping the rewrite goes as smoothly as it's been going in my head (HA!).